THE PROCESS OF FORGIVENESS
Forgiveness
is hard work and requires perseverance to be effective. There is a
process outlined in today’s Gospel that provides a few rudimentary
principles that we can apply. It is not a comprehensive description that
will fit all occasions. Each of us will have to discern how to best forgive those who
sin against us and ask forgiveness from those we have sinned against,
according to the nature and circumstance of the act. This is not giving
license to relativism. It is merely respecting the fact that no two
situations are perfectly alike. Every person approaches things in a
slightly different way
and we need to respect that.
Having said that, the basics are fundamental: Forgiveness is a goal
whose path may be long and winding or relatively short, depending on the
situation and the people involved. It is crucial that we always
remember that there are at least two sides to any story and we need to
be careful in making assumptions. In fact, assumptions are best avoided
altogether. Dialogue and mutual understanding are the keys to conflict resolution.
Jesus shows the way with the example of His life. For Him, there is no
sin too big that cannot be forgiven. When you consider that even the smallest
sin is of infinite insult to His goodness, this is saying something
indeed. There are many horrific sins committed against innocent people
but even
these pale in comparison to how God experiences our sinfulness. Let us
then, having received God’s mercy in our own lives, seek to give that
same mercy to those who sin against us. Let us try to look beyond our
own hurts and see the hurts and struggles of others, so that we
may understand their actions better, no matter how hard it may be for
us. Fr. Steve Tynan, MGL
REFLECTION QUESTION: Do you find it hard to forgive? Ask God for the grace to do so.
Jesus,
You are the only way to the Father and that way includes the ministry
of forgiveness. Help me to forgive others in the same way You have
forgiven my sins.
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