Do you confuse acceptance for condoning? Love for approval? Pray for the wisdom to see the difference - Daily Reflections February 4,2015

TO PARENTS AND CHILDREN

A father and his son passed by a night club. The father cautioned his son against visiting the club. “Son, never go in there. You will see something you should not see.” After some days, the son approached the father and said, “Dad, I have to be honest with you. I went inside the club and, as you said, I saw something I should not see.” Then he continued, “I saw you with another girl.” The father was trying to discipline his son. Unfortunately, he also needs some disciplining.

       Our culture tells parents to allow their children to be themselves and let them have their way. Parents are encouraged to be buddies to their children. While there is wisdom in such parenting style, at times an important truth is left out. More than a buddy, children need a parent too — one who has gone through (and hopefully learned from) everything that the children are going through and is committed to sharing it to them for their betterment. Only a parent can and should give a child the discipline he needs. Proverbs 13:24 says, “Whoever spares the rod hates their children, but the one who loves their children is careful to discipline them.”

       The First Reading gives us a clue on how to discipline children properly. God Himself is a parent who does not spare the rod to discipline His children: “My sons, do not disdain the discipline of the Lord, nor lose heart when He reproves you; for whom the Lord loves, He disciplines; He scourges every son He receives.” God loves us unconditionally, but we must not confuse this to unconditional approval. There are actions that do not have God’s approval.

       To the parents and guardians reading this, do not be afraid to discipline your children. The Book of Proverbs says, “Let love and not anger be the guiding motive of your acts of disciplining.” To the children still under parental authority, pray for your parents and learn to trust them. Next to no one, parents are the ones ready to give their lives for their children. Fr. Joel Jason

REFLECTION QUESTIONS: Do you confuse acceptance for condoning? Love for approval? Pray for the wisdom to see the difference.

Purify our anger, disappointments and frustrations, Lord, that our acts of disciplining may always be grounded by love and love alone. Amen.