Daily Reflections - March 5,2013

WHAT IS FORGIVENESS?

 

Among all the beings that God created, forgiveness is unique to human beings. Forgiveness is about making a choice to let go of the hurt that someone has done to us, and trying to restore the relationship that has been damaged. Forgiveness works most effectively when it is a sacramental reality, that is, when the parties involved are physically present to one another. Yes, it is possible to apologize over the phone but I do not recommend it unless it is the only means possible to establish contact between the disputing parties.

Forgiveness is about the ministry of love — a healing love that will help mend the broken aspects of a relationship. Forgiveness is a decision that an individual makes to heal a particular relationship. The decision may or may not be motivated or empowered by feelings. A person may simply choose to forgive because he or she knows that it is the right thing to do in the situation.

Forgiveness is rarely easy or simple. It is usually complicated and messy, particularly if issues have been left to fester and grow bigger over time. Most people need some time to cool down before the decision to forgive can be properly addressed, but this should never be an excuse to keep delaying a decision, as the longer it takes to forgive, the more difficult it can become.

Jesus tells Peter that forgiveness knows no bounds. This is true, but it does not mean that we do not take precautions to protect ourselves from a persistent sinner. Another thing to recognize is that when trust in a relationship has been broken, it takes a long time to heal and rarely heals to perfection. There usually remains a lasting strain in the relationship that has been damaged. Yes, it can be healed to a workable level, but that innate sense of trust that is usually present in all serious new relationships is gone forever. It is as though the innocence of the relationship has been taken away. Fr. Steve Tynan, MGL

 

REFLECTION QUESTIONS: What is your experience of relationships damaged by your own sin or the sins of others? How can you be more loving and self-giving in your relationships?

 

Jesus, help me learn to forgive others as You have forgiven me. Show me how to do this better than I do now.